Pills Don’t Teach Skills

I posted this a couple years ago and revistited it with my coach Pate Quily today. I love this and wanted to share it again.
There are many ways to engage in self analysis, such as with counselors, personal coaches or just thinking. For me the simplest way was to develop a list of criteria by which I could reflect back on regularly and analyze my self with. Basically, a self grading system. Here is the list that I use every Sunday night for 10-15 minutes:

Avoiding Conflict – did I avoid conflict in certain situations? What could I have done better? What did I do well?
Fun – whatever I did, did I have fun? If not, why?
Problems – what problems did I encounter and how did these occur? How can they be avoided?
Value – What value did I offer in particular situations, actions or conversations?
Win-Win – What situations was I involved in where my efforts could have been better and benefited all?
Patience – Did I lack patience in a particular experience? Where did I show patience successfully?
Intimacy – Did I allow myself to communicate and open up in intimate situations, letting someone else get what they needed from me?
Defensiveness – was I defensive or over reactive in any situations? If yes, why?
Dealing with Change – What changed? Why did it change? How did I handle it?
Familiarity – Is my familiarity crossing the line of complacency? Is it OK or do I need to shake it up a bit?
Balance – is my life balanced? If not, what needs to change?
Kindness – did I perform any acts of kindness? Could I have been kinder in a situation?
Laughter – was I laughing? If not, why not?!
Disorganization – how was my organization and structure recently?
Telling myself the Truth – was I kidding myself and not being honest with a decision I had to make?
Hard times – how did I react? Good? Bad?
Thoughtfulness – what thoughtful actions or comments did I experience? Was it me? Was it someone else?
Rewarding Ourselves – what is my reward for doing something well?
Being Spontaneous – did I loosen up and just roll with it, live on the edge a little?
Celebration – did I take any time to celebrate what I have in my life and appreciate my surroundings?

It only takes a few minutes to sit and think through this list. However, that time is an educational thinking process that helps to determine my direction and actions for the coming week. It makes me aware and alert of all the criteria by which I measure myself.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, October 21st, 2009 at 2:47 pm and is filed under Thoughts on ADD. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.