Pills Don’t Teach Skills

I have a good friend Michelle Hargreaves, who is a coach http://www.hargreavesco.com. Michelle has some great things to say and as we were catching up this week, she said something to me that spawned a great conversation……and this post too!

“When you try too hard the wheels fall off” is what Michelle said. I thought that was great! It really holds true for a person with ADD. When a typical ADD’er is engaged in a task, or many tasks (ha-ha) they will sometimes be trying too hard. By trying too hard, this could mean trying to do too much, or their hyper-activity results in pushing too hard on a particular task. When an ADD’er is trying to do too much in a rush and not paying attention to detail, things can go wrong……the wheels can fall off.

We need to ensure those lug-nuts are securely tightened to be sure the wheels don’t fall off. What does this mean? From my perspective it really means being sure I don’t try and accomplish too much at once. As an example, I have a tendency to try and multi-task when I am on a phone conference. My mind kicks into overdrive and I feel like I can listen in on a conference call, read & send emails and do other things at my desk. The truth is, I can’t do all that. My wanting to take on too much at the same time ends up hurting me. The end results in this particular situation;

1. I miss out on certain details of the phone conference
2. I misread emails and miss out on important details
3. I make mistakes in sending out emails

In summary, my wheels fall off!! It reminds me of the kid’s song The Wheels On The Bus Go Round and Round:

“The wheels on the bus go round and round,
round and round,
round and round.
The wheels on the bus go round and round,
all through the town.”

Ya, the song doesn’t mention that the wheels on the bus fall off, does it!! LOL!

What is the cost of trying to do too much? That is a loaded question with many different out-comes that can create a domino effect of results.

Today more than ever, people are outsourcing in business and personally. On a personal level, maybe someone hires a housekeeper, or a gardener to cut their lawn. It saves time and effort. When a person has ADD, a typical challenge is trying to take on too much. Yes, we ADD’ers will beet ourselves up for not accomplishing everything we set out to do. We all need to take a step back and realize nobody can accomplish everything, or be perfect. We can’t take everything on and be successful. Heck, a Major League baseball player is doing a great job if his batting average is above .300. For those of you not familiar with baseball stats, a .300 batting average means a baseball player gets a hit 3 times in every 10 at bats. That’s a good deal…..getting paid millions to fail 7 out of every 10 attempts!!!

Getting back on track, when it comes to outsourcing in our own lives…..we need help. We don’t have to be perfect at everything. We must let go of that thought process and apply our focus and energy on a number of key tasks or objectives that are manageable. It’s OK to ask for help. It’s OK to delegate. It’s OK to say no. Why is the President of a company successful? Because successful Presidents will lean on a good support group or supporting cast to help in achieving their goals.

I had a great coaching session this week with my ADD Coach Pete Quily and much of this post was discussed. I took an awful lot from this particular session with Pete. Over the past few weeks I have learned a lot about not trying to do too much, about allowing people to assist and realizing it’s OK if I can’t do it all.

I’d rather succeed at a few things, than achieve mediocrity or perhaps fail by trying to do too many things. OK, time for Domino’s pizza accompanied by some classic Van Morrison…… “I said oohhhh oohhhh domino”.

Sounds like an oxy-moron. It’s true though. How can you be productive if you are worn out, stressed and you need some down time. Our bodies and brains need to be relaxed in order to be productive. There is of course the odd example that contradicts this and some people simply come alive and thrive in stressed out and intense situations. But hey, let’s not forget about the forum we are in right now, ADD right!

A typical ADD’er is not productive when they are worn out, stressed and need that down time. It is so important to take that time for yourself to recharge. It may be as simple as a 20 minute cat-nap, or even a walk around the block to give yourself a break from your work.

For an ADD’er there is one simple formula that is successful and will enhance results, Relaxation = Productivity.

Just a quick post to thank everyone from 25 countries around the world for making the past 30 days the all-time highest site traffic we have ever seen! Your comments and direct emails are really appreciated. Thank you!

No, it is not the cure….but I got a good laugh from this and thought you might as well. Enjoy!

In one episode of the TV show Cheers, Cliff is seated at the bar describing the life of the Buffalo theory to his buddy, Norm.

“Well you see Norm, it’s like this….a herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo and when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first.”

Cliff continues…

“This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That’s why you always feel smarter after a few beers.”

In the 1970’s the TV game show To Tell the Truth was on the air. The show was hosted by many over the years like Bert Convy and Merv Griffin, to name two.

“The truth is out there”, to quote the Sci-fi TV show, The X Files. Telling the truth also relates to ADD. Many ADD’ers are caught up in the challenges of scheduling, organization and often have a hard time saying no. Part of the challenge in saying no, sometimes relates to speaking the truth. I’m not talking about lying. I’m actually referring to overcoming the fear of saying what needs to be said, sometimes it’s a hard message to deliver. When we need to deliver that hard message, it could be something as simple as letting a person know you don’t have time to get together for lunch. It could also be a very hard thing to say in a relationship. Often, procrastination delays the truth.

When we take a calm and relaxed approach to speaking the truth, the truth is almost always heard and accepted by the person who needs to hear it. It opens the channels of communications, gains peoples respect and avoids the fear and procrastination that many people get caught up in. Any ADD’er will tell you, when you put something off or don’t take a challenge head on……in piles up and can quickly turn a mole hill into a mountain.

We have all heard the phrase “the calm before the storm”, which in your case may relate to the weather, the havoc kids create on your weekend or even the hit song by Fall Out Boy.

I’ve decided to revise this phrase with an ADD twist. Now, it’s “the calm before the calm”. An ADD’er is familiar with the state of being wound up, hyper, frenzied or frantic. Often, this state of being can result in our creative ability shining through or being incredibly productive. It can also lead to a person with ADD experiencing some negatives. The state of being hyper and frenzied can create tension in the body and produce a body language that will be misinterpreted by others. Kind of like sending the wrong message.

In order to project a calmer state of being, we must engage in a thought process that comes from a place of being calm. We don’t get to a calm place by being hyper, we get there by being calm. The calm before the calm.

I have found it very effective to harness calmness in my actions. Instead of bouncing around the house getting things done in a frenzy, I now get things done around the house in a calm smooth fashion. I’ll reach for something in a cupboard a second slower. When I’m washing a pot, I’ll scrub it a little easier, instead of trying to remove the cooking surface. When the oven timer goes off telling me the food is ready, I’ll ease my way over to where the oven-mits are and take out the food enjoying the smell of the meal, instead of shooting to the oven like a rocket to get the food out and bang the oven door shut.

People with good emotional health are aware of their thoughts, feelings and behaviors. This is usually evident I the calmness of their actions. They have learned healthy ways to cope with the stress and problems that are a normal part of life.

However, many things that happen in our life can disrupt our emotional health and lead to strong feelings of sadness, stress or anxiety. Often with ADD, we then find our selves back in that frenzied and frantic place. However, you don’t have to go back there, to frenzy-ville. Not really a nice place to visit.

Find your way to be calm. Maybe it’s counting, or taking a deep breath. You may find calmness in something a simple as whistling. Find a way to be calm before you act. I have found it to be very rewarding. I use less energy, have more to give and find myself in a calmer and more enjoyable place.

You too can be a super hero!!! Leap tall buildings in a single bound! Fight the powers of evil! Lead man-kind to a better place……..or, maybe not. You do however, have the power to be a super hero to yourself and the people around you.

How? That’s a good question. In my humble opinion, it’s by being the best you can be. In dealing with ADD we all have challenges that we face in may different formats. Let me share one challenge I have and how I overcame it.

Like many people, I was protein deficient. I have posted before about food and nutrition. Something that is common with ADD’ers, we need to find a way to keep our brains charged, on track and in a productive state. As we all know, ADD will impact our ability to focus, think a certain way, maintain control of emotion and toss many other challenges at us. One of the keys to keeping our brain functioning, is to fuel our bodies effectively. A very important factor in the balance of nutrition is protein. Proteins are essential for growth and repair. They play a crucial role in virtually all biological processes in the body. But unlike fat and carbohydrates, the body does not store protein, and therefore has no reservoir to draw on when it needs a new supply. So, we need to replenish the protein in our bodies.

Most people are actually protein deficient. Proteins help to maintain the body’s fluid and electrolyte balance. If your body does not get the protein it requires, you won’t function the way you are capable of functioning. If your brain isn’t getting the fuel it needs, just think about how that will impact a person with ADD.

As an ADD’er, I have found managing my protein intake, especially by time periods throughout the day, effectively helps me avoid physical lows. Ultimatly, my brain gets the fuel it needs and allows me to effective and manage ADD. Whey protein (in a shake) is a source that I have found benefitial. Other good sources of proteins include beef, chicken, fish, pork, eggs, dairy, beans, nuts and seeds. Like any health, dietary or nutritional products you may consider using, always check with your Doctor first.

Chances are protein will not make you stronger than a locomotive or faster than a speeding bullet. Protein used effectively will allow you to be your own Superman……..or Superwoman!

I recently adopted a new motto, Do it – Schedule it – Drop it.

While it may not qualify for the Motto Hall of Fame, it sure has been effective in helping me stay focused and avoid procrastination. If you have ADD or know anyone who does, perhaps this can assist.

Throughout my work day I experience a very busy work load. I need to reprioritize, refocus, reschedule and it can become overwhelming at times. One ADD habit I have always struggled with is deciding, or maybe procrastinating is more accurate……what I should do with a new task I need to tackle.

As an example, I received an email recently which required me to set aside some time to accomplish a task. To be honest, the though of this task was such a drag that I had no motivation or excitement to complete it. So, I sat on it and didn’t get around to doing it until the very last minute. This approach created stress, impacted my mood and resulted in a rushed final result. I wasn’t as effective as I should have been.

When tasks now arise I ask myself, do I do it? If the answer is to get on it right away, I’m done. If the answer is no, I ask myself, should I schedule it? If the answer is yes, I set a time in my Outlook calendar to accomplish the task. If the answer is no, I drop it.

I don’t waste my time when I have made a choice to focus my efforts on other more important things. It’s OK to pass on doing some things. We ADD’ers like to try and do too much some times!!

It’s helping me, maybe it can help you? Oh, by the way……if anyone knows where the Motto Hall of Fame is, please let me know. I’m looking for a summer get away idea

During your day, when is your most productive time? When do you peak? When do you need to take a step back and recharge your batteries? These are all good questions that need to be considered for any person with ADD.

Looking at productivity from the other side…..what is the personal cost if you don’t know when your peak times of productivity are? It can be costly and we need to understand who we are and what it takes for us to be successful. Part of that equation is learning when you are your most productive. Perhaps you are a morning person. You may be a night-owl. You may have the ability to really turn up your activity level in the afternoon. Every person is unique and we need to find out when we peak and take advantage of that.

Personally, I’m a morning person. My mornings are very structured ensuring I’m as productive as I can be. Like the old Army TV commercial, “we accomplish more before 9:00AM than most people do all day”. I’m up early, have a well balance and healthy breakfast and start into my work day. I’ll typically have my day planned out in advance so that I can hit the ground running at full speed after breakfast. I also have a morning snack to keep my energy levels up along with a never ending bottle of water.

Around noon, I’ll usually work out at the gym or run…… followed by a healthy lunch full of food energy. The exercise and lunch is extremely important for me, because I am a morning person and tend to struggle in the afternoons. By exercising and eating well, I increase my effectiveness during my non-peak hours of the day. I also find it effective to take a few 5 minute breaks in the afternoon. I’ve worked on this lately!!

While understanding what it takes to get the most out of ourselves during our peak periods, we must also be aware of how to better manage ourselves in these non-peak periods as well.

We can harness our own power and capabilities, if we understand what it takes to achieve this. What are you going to do to take advantage of your peak time today?